Frost
by xrhayne
Summary: REPOST RanKen fic. Poor Ken.
1. Chapter 1

Frost by xrhayne (writing under Kage Kurokawa)

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN Takehiko Koyasu and Project Weiss. Takehiko Koyasu and Project Weiss OWN Weiss Kreuz. Therefore, I DO NOT OWN Weiss Kreuz.

A/N: Ah minna san… this was my first Weiss Kreuz fic ever, dedicated it to my favorite Weiss pair Ran/Ken… So kawaii those two… (chuckles!) I am feeling nostalgic reposting and reviving my old fics… sigh

Warning: Errr… shounen ai… don't like? Read something else. And some language… Oh and is this angst? And I tend to be quite melodramatic it seems… Ahh…Well… to quote my all time favorite chara from somewhere… "Yare, yare…"

Frost by xrhayne (writing under Kage Kurokawa)

The night covered the city under a veil of black. The moon is nowhere in sight. No stars too. There is only a canopy of dark heavy clouds that brought and onslaught of snow to kiss the earth. Sometimes, even Mother Nature seems give a pittance of sympathy to the dismal disposition of man. And tonight she chose to empathize with the silent tears of a broken figure, slumped wearily on a wall at a deserted alleyway somewhere in the city.

The man is tired, bruised and bleeding. His jeans torn on the knees and on the sides. His black jacket ripped at the shoulder. This is due to the force of impact when he hit the hard, solid concrete as he fell from his motorcycle earlier. The said vehicle now lying in a useless broken heap a few meters from him. But the man didn't seem to care. Oblivious to the pain of his body, the dirt he is lying on and the cold frost seeping through his torn clothing. None of that really mattered.

He did not fucking care.

Tanned hands swept chocolate strands away from his face as he lets the white crystals land softly on his injured face. Blue-green eyes closed to the world for a while as quiet tears freely flowed melting the snow that strayed into that stained face.

Behind closed lids, an image haunts unseeing eyes. Red hair. Violet eyes. Pale skin. And a very good right hand. Hands slowly went to a bruised left cheek. Damn good right hand.

It had been his fault. After all, he should have known better. He should have known by now that Aya will always be unpredictable. He had been so wrong in his assumptions. He thought the cold bastard actually cared about him. The stolen glances. A few kind acts every now and then. The teasing from this blond playboy. The encouragement from this genki little smiley. And he, Ken Hidaka, the idiot that he was, presumed that there could indeed be an underlying emotion underneath it all. And thus was proven, painfully, that he was only seeing things. After all, how could anyone bother with someone as stained as him…

_Earlier that day:_

"_Hey Kenken."_

"…"

"_Earth to Kenken!"_

"…"

"_Hey look a naked girl's running down the street!"_

"…"

"_Hey look! Aya's in a birthday suit!"_

"_Huh!"_

"_Got ya!"_

"_Youji!"_

"_You should see your face, right about now. Hehehe."_

_xxx_

"_Anou, Ken-kun are you alright?"_

"_I'm fine Omi. Why do you ask?"_

"_Coz' Chibi here probably noticed you spacing out for about the nth time today."_

"_Was I? Sorry 'bout that. Where's Aya?"_

"_At the back, arranging the new arrivals?"_

"_We have new arrivals?"_

"_Ha! Shows just how lovesick you are."_

"_Yo-tan!"_

"_Why the hell don't you just 'fess up Kenken? It'll save you some trouble."_

"_Actually, that's what I'm planning to do tonight."_

"_Why wait for tonight when, you've got here and now?"_

"_I'm nervous you guys."_

"_No need for that Ken-kun. I'm positive that Aya-kun likes you back."_

"_Are you sure?"_

"_Yeah, we're sure. I mean, you should see the way he stares at your butt when you bend over. It's shameless, really."_

"_Yo- youji!"_

"_So could you guys do me a favor…"_

"_Oh we know already… We're gonna make ourselves scarce tonight so you can have your little moment-"_

"_Youji!"_

"_Hahaha. Come on, just chill Ken. It's gonna be okay. The worse that could happen is lover boy jumping on your pants before your big date."_

"_YOUJI!"_

"_Stop teasing Yo-tan. We're wishing you the best of luck Ken-kun."_

"_Thanks Omi. I have a feeling I'm gonna need it."_

At that moment he didn't realize just how much luck he's going to need.

_Evening…_

"_Hey Aya, can I talk to you for a second?"_

"_I'm busy Ken, we're closing up."_

"_Ummm… it would only take a minute."_

"_I don't have a minute. And we're the hell is Omi and that the useless bum?"_

"_Anou, Omi had a report to finish and went off to the library. Youji had a date…"_

"…"

"…"

_xxx_

"_Well?"_

"_Uhhh... Well what, Aya?"_

"_Are you going to sit there and watch the shop close by itself?"_

"_Uhh… No. I'll help you."_

"_Then move."_

_xxx_

"_Anou, Aya can I ask you a question?"_

"_As long as you don't waste my time."_

"_You sound like you're in a hurry. Are you going somewhere tonight?"_

"_None of your business."_

"_But Aya-"_

"_You've had your question."_

"_Aya-"_

The red-headed leader of Weiss walked off without a backward glance, leaving the dejected figure that stared at his retreating figure. And light snow began to drizzle on the pavement.

_Later…_

_Snow is still falling outside._

_The clock read 10:30 p.m. Ken Hidaka paced around his room anxiously. Omi's fast asleep in his room. Youji probably won't be coming home from his date. And Aya… Aya still hasn't returned from his little expedition at heaven-knows-where. All the waiting is unnerving the soccer player._

_Yes. He was waiting for Fujimiya Aya, his efficient, taciturn leader. He didn't have the chance to voice out his question earlier when the redhead so easily dismissed him before walking away._

_Darn it! How the hell does he begin his speech? He's clumsy enough as it is in front of Aya, not to mention the fact that he gets tongue-tied in the presence of his gorgeous leader. Will Aya be returning soon? The sound of the main door opening and closing is a most anticipated and most dreaded moment of the night._

'_Calm down Ken. You can do this. Deep breath.'_

_And there it was. That click of the lock that signals the arrival of the awaited person. Ken went out of his room and into the hallway to meet Aya._

'_Okay deep breath Ken. Here we go…'_

_Footsteps reached the top landing. Ken paused. Looked up. And found himself staring at the most beautiful pair of amethyst eyes that he has ever seen. He forgot how to breathe._

"_What are you doing up Ken?"_

"_Well… I was waiting for you…"_

"_Why?"_

"_Well I'd like to ask you something?"_

"_Again?"_

"_No Aya. Seriously, I've been wanting to ask you something since this evening."_

"…" _Stare._

"_Umm…well… you see… err… how do I start…"_

"_Quit rambling Ken. If you're gonna waste my time, I'm off to bed."_

"_Wait! Willyougooutandhavedinnerand watchamoviewithmetomorrow?"_

"_I did not understand a word."_

"_I said, will you go out and have dinner with me tomorrow, and maybe watch a movie afterwards?"_

"_What? Like a date?"_

"_Well… uh… yes?"_

"…"

"_Ummm… Aya?"_

"…"

"…"

"_I don't swerve that way Ken"_

"_Oh. I'm sorry then. I just thought…"_

"_You thought wrong."_

"_Well I'm sorry for wasting your time… I hope this doesn't affect our…" What can he say now? Friendship? Aya doesn't even seem to acknowledge that friendship… and he, Ken Hidaka, always assumes too much…_

"…_working relationship." Yes, that's all there is to it._

_He turned and walked to his room. Something stinging in his eyes. Then all of a sudden he was pulled back, crushed in a tight embrace and his lips assaulted with a rough kiss._

_Ken thought he had died and gone to heaven. The kiss was everything he hoped for and more. Nothing else matters. Who knew Aya would be such a passionate kisser? Lack of air finally forced them apart. Arms loosened slightly._

_By golly, Aya likes him! And man, does he love Aya! This means that there could be a chance…_

_Kenken looked up with a soft smile on his lips. Anticipation in his eyes. Only to be met with a good right hand fist connecting with his left cheek. His form staggered backwards._

_Wide blue green eyes opened wide in shock._

_Did Aya just fucking hit him?_

_No._

_Not Aya._

_Aya likes him._

_Aya just kissed him._

_Hestood there, gaping at his leader. No trace of emotion can be seen on the redhead's face. No hint of feeling in those violet eyes. Cold. Unsympathetic. Almost cruel._

_He slowly took several steps forward. One. Two. Three._

"_Aya…"_

_And another fist made contact. Hard. Bruising. Enough to draw blood._

_He fell on his knees. He couldn't move._

_His leader calmly walked away without a word. Not one fucking word. And there was silence in the dark hall, where the broken figure of a man kneels, with his head bowed low, his hands falling limply on his sides. Unmoving. Unbelieving… Bleeding. And the silent tears began to fall…_

_After a while came a whisper._

"_Why?"_

_Broken. But a whisper._

"_Why?"_

_Drooping fists began to clench. Tears stopped falling._

_Ken Hidaka got up. Walked to his room. Grabbed a jacket. And went out to ride his bike. He needed to clear his head._

_The clock read 11:30._

_It was snowing. No. Not snowing. It was a bloody blizzard. The sky seemed to have opened up and decided to dump the Antarctic on this side of the planet. Who cares? The snow fell hard on him as he manoeuvred his bike down the streets of Tokyo, breaking speed limits. Who cares? The road is dark and slippery. Who the fuck cares?_

_The streets are almost empty because of the heavy snowfall. But there are still occasional bright lights flashing all around, billboards of reindeer and smiling Santas here and there, reminding people what this season is all about. Some faint far away carols echo from a distance. But it doesn't mean anything to the brunette zooming down the deserted roads._

_He made a wrong turn. His motorbike slid and he was hurled meters away. He hit the wet pavement. Hard. Painful. Might have broken some bones. Who the hell cares? Not him._

_His watch read. 12:01 am._

_It's December 23. His birthday. What was that line again? Right. Reality's a bitch._

"_Happy Birthday to Me. Yay."_

_And Ken Hidaka fell asleep under the blanket of snow._

_xxx_

The next morning, there were only three men on duty in the Koneko flower shop. It's gonna be quite a dismal day again, it seems. People would rather stay warm at home than brave the cold weather. Or else, go to the mall and buy gifts. Flowers stay in bloom for only while after all. Business is gonna be quite slow… 'til Christmas day…

Inside…

"Hey Chibi, have you seen Kenken around."

"No Youji. I knocked on his door this morning but there was no response."

"Oi, Aya. Have you seen our little Kenken?"

"How the hell should I know Kudou?"

"I thought he spent the night at you place."

Glare.

"Kidding aside Aya, do you know where he is?"

"I'm not his babysitter."

"Hmph. Really, you give Scrooge a good run for his money, Fujimiya."

"Shut up and get to work, Kudou."

"You know, it's supposed to be the 'season to be jolly, falalalalalala…"

"Shut it!"

xxx

The day wore on but still Ken's shadow was nowhere in sight at the shop.

"Guys I'm worried..."

"Aww sheesh, chibi. Kenken's just probably prepping himself up for his date tonight."

"Huh?"

"That bastard. He took the day off to impress Mr. Grouchy. I'm supposed to be the only who lazes for the dates."

"Youji-kun-"

"Hey Aya, you sure you didn't know where Ken went?"

"…"

"That guy's been acting strange since this morning. What do you think Chibi?"

"I agree Yo-tan."

"Will you two stop talking and start arranging?"

"Yes, o high and mighty one."

xxx

"Hey guys, do you know what today is?"

"Today is Thursday."

"Yes, it's Thursday, and it's December 23. Ken-kun's birthday!"

A certain red-head froze.

"It is? Man, I forgot. I didn't get him any present."

"Birthday?" Came a deep low voice. Hesitant.

"Hai, Aya."

"You'd better be planning something special for your date tonight Fujimiya. I'm even willing to take on your work for the day so you can go grab Kenken a nice gift."

"What date?"

Uh-oh.

"Oh come on Aya. He asked you out yesterday, didn't he?"

"…"

"Aya?"

"Get back to work."

Aya turned away and went out back leaving two people silently staring at his back.

xxx

Ken didn't return on his birthday. He didn't show up to work the next day. He wasn't home for Christmas. There were no messages, no phone calls. Nothing. No sign from the brunette if he was still alive and breathing. Omi and Youji were worried. They knew something must have happened. Aya remained silent. And seemingly unaffected, but he was a bit more irritable than usual. Luckily they didn't have any missions coming up yet. They were contemplating on searching for Kenken if the J-leaguer didn't show up any time soon.

xxx

On the 26th Ken finally decided to grace the shop with his pretty, yet still slightly bruised up face. One of his hands was wrapped up in bandages. His clothes were dirty and ripped, his jeans quite tattered.

Omi's eyes bugged out of his head. Youji frowned. Aya simply stared.

"Ken-kun what happened!"

"Don't fuss Omi I'm fine." At the smaller blonde's raised eyebrows Ken looked at the state of his clothing and smiled. "Well, sort of anyway."

"Kenken! Did you get hit by a speeding bus or something?"

"I wish," the brunette muttered.

"What?"

"No Youji. Nothing that exciting. I just fell off my bike that's all." Another smile.

"You fell of your bike!"

"Yeah. Took a turn too fast. A patrolling policeman found me and brought me to the hospital."

"But why didn't you tell us that-"

"Because I don't want you guys to worry about me, okay?"

"And you think disappearing for three days without a word would not worry us?"

"Sorry Yo-tan. I better go to my room and rest for a bit. I can return to work tomorrow." A look that pleaded for no more questions. Luckily, it was heeded by the two blondes.

"Rest well ken, okay?"

"Thanks, Omi."

xxx

The next day, Ken went back to work, being his usual self. He smiled and politely entertained customers. He joked around with Omi and Youji, made a few clumsy mistakes with some plants. Typical Kenken. But some things are amiss. For one he wouldn't look people in the eyes, and he's unusually silent around Aya. He's often out of it, mind drifting somewhere else, but in a different way. Not very noticeable to most people, but very evident to one particular pair of amethyst eyes that had been staring intently at the brunette all day.

xxx

That night…

A knock sounded at Ken's door. It was a light knock. Soft. Tentative. Then firm. The soccer player started at the sound.

"Come in. it's open."

An all too familiar vision greeted his line of sight. Red hair, violet eyes, pale skin clothed in a white sweater and tight denim jeans… gorgeous.

Aya.

"I believe we have things to discuss Hida- Ken."

"Really? I think your message came loud and clear, Aya."

"Ken-"

"Look, I know we can't ignore the fact that things had happened okay? And maybe we can't forget it, but it's done. Let's just deal with it and go our separate ways. There's nothing to discuss."

"Ken, I want to apo-"

"Cut the crap Aya. I'd like to pretend that you actually mean that, and that I wasn't hurt, and apology accepted but I can't, okay? Anyhow, I've begun to understand where you're coming from. So let's just be civil to one another from now on. We can't let petty things like this affect the team."

"Petty?"

"Yes. What else would you call it? It was petty. We're assassins. We can't allow ourselves to have these heavy sentiments. A stupid mistake on my part, really. Don't worry I'll get over it."

Avoidant blue green eyes.

"But Ken-"

A hint of pleading?

No, Hidaka's hearing things again.

"Look, I would like to act like I wanted to stay and chat but I can't. There's some place that I've got to be. You can see yourself out, I'm sure. See you at work."

And the door closed behind the brown haired, soccer player. Not knowing that if he bothered to glance up, he would have seen the hurt written all over his leader's face.

xxx

Ken Hidaka stood by a grave amidst the snow-covered ground. His gaze focused on the tombstone.

"You were right you know. Once a sucker, always a sucker… Kaze."

And as he slowly walked away, he could feel the frost seep through the material of his clothing. Onto his skin, seeping through his pores, into his veins, and that throbbing system on his chest. He welcomed the chill. With some luck, tomorrow he'll wake feeling nothing at all…

End chapter

Reviews are much appreciated.

Note: As listed in my profile, I am currently organizing, retouching, reposting, and updating all my fanfics from my ex pen names: Kage-kurokawa and 83rd twilight under xrhayne. As well as posting my new fics here.

Thanks


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own Ran and Ken in my dreams. So NO xrhayne DOES NOT and will NEVER own WEISS.

Oh how I lament reality! (Author bopped for being so overdramatic.)

Frost

Part II Games

A snow covered morning greeted the metropolis, the clouds thinning a bit to allow faint rays of sunlight to filter through to the world below.

On a room atop a little flower shop, a certain brunette grudgingly woke up from a dreamless slumber to tired muscles and tender healing bruises. Ken Hidaka slowly stretched his body, careful not to pull on any injured muscles. His blue green eyes opened hesitantly to meet the pale light streaming into the window. Somehow he feels drained even after sleep. It must have been because he had walked aimlessly for hour the previous night before he decided to turn in. The same routine he'd been doing for two nights now.

Damn, he is tired.

_But the room is cold_.

His brain is still muzzy.

_Still, it feels the cold._

He wants to sleep some more.

_But it's cold under covers too._

And he has to go to work.

_Maybe the heater's broken down._

It's time to take that hot shower.

_Damn, it's too cold._

Thus, he got up and took a very hot shower.

Enough to sting uncomfortably, but not enough to burn.

And yet the second he got out, it was still feels…

Cold.

xxx

The day proved to be quite a busy one at the Koneko flower shop. That infamous blonde playboy went out to do the morning deliveries and probably won't be back till lunch or after he gets some pretty girl's number in his little black book. The blonde genki, on the other hand went out back to water the new stocks that came earlier. Inside the shop, one customer satisfactorily went out the door with a bunch of flowers in hand leaving the shop empty save for two people. And silence hung in the air for some minutes. Or maybe half an hour. Or longer.

A certain redhead sat on the counter quietly stared at an unmoving brunette who was supposed to arranging an order. Ken was staring into space, one his hands frozen in mid-action, holding a leaf, while the other, holding the scissor was busily cutting through the air. He had that 'i'm-somewhere-in-la-la-land' look again for the nth time over the past few days.

Well, Aya got tired of staring and scowled.

Blue green orbs were jolted out of trance as their owner felt something on his lips, and was greeted by the sight of half lidded amethyst gems and warm lips on his.

Suddenly it wasn't cold any more.

Until reality came crashing down.

_What the he-?_

"Daydreaming 'bout me, Kenken?" The voice was low, flat, cold. Pale, beautiful face sporting a small smirk. Seemingly mocking. Would've made Youji proud.

Ken felt his face burn in embarrassment.

A second of silence.

Before a resounding slap broke the stillness in reply.

Pale face now marred with red stinging mark.

Blue green eyes began to feel something stinging.

_Damn, his hand hurt._

"Fuck you, Fujimiya." He is confused but he will not give in.

"Oh is that what you were dreaming about?" came the icy reply.

A good uppercut would have connected with Aya's jaw had he not been able to catch it, while effectively dodging another and then catching that one as well. And thus they stood there in the middle of the shop. One glaring openly, looking a bit flushed, and the other staring back coolly. Before the moment was broken.

"Let me go damn it!" And the soccer player began to struggle against his leader's firm grip. To no avail.

Until…

"Hey Ken-kun…"

Omi called from the back. Approaching footsteps can be heard.

Aya's hold abruptly loosened.

Ken gathered his wits while the redhead just turned his back and walk calmly to the counter.

The brunette glared daggers at his leader's turned back until the cheerful voice sounded in his ears once more.

"Hey Ken-kun…"

He turned just to see the young blonde standing by the back door.

"…can you help me bring in some of the plants?"

"Sure Omi."

"Is Youji back yet?"

"Oh you know that guy; he's probably finding a date on the side."

xxx

Out back, Ken began to lift the first plant.

Then Omi just had to say something.

"Anou, Ken…" He's got that look on his face.

"Yes, Omi?" Ken knows that look.

"Are you alright?" Damn, he knew it. It's that 'I-know-something's-wrong-but I'll-play innocent-till-you-tell-me' kind of look.

"Why do you ask?" Uh-oh. Ken thinks, _'I can't deal with this right now.'_ And thus the game of playing dumb began with the two best friends.

"Your face is all red." Which translates to: 'Something happened in there with Aya. That you don't want to talk about.'

"It is?" Meaning: 'it's that obvious?'

A hand reached out and touched Ken's forehead. "You're hot too. You might have a fever." Meaning: 'I can see right through you.'

Ken did not reply.

Omi tried again. "Maybe you're having a relapse." Read: 'do you want to talk about it?'

"Stop fussing Omi." Meaning: 'I don't want to talk right now okay?'

"Maybe you should go rest." Which means exactly what it means: 'take a break.'

"I'm fine, really." Read: 'I'm not backing down. I can handle it.'

The plant was taken from the brunette's arms, before a stubborn reply came: "Go. Rest. Or I'll ask Aya to make you." This was of course resorting to blackmail. Meaning: 'Go and brood where we can't see you."

And thus Ken reluctantly carried his heavy feet into the shop and up the stairs when he heard voices that froze him in midstep.

"Hey Aya." Youji.

"Go away, Kudou." Aya.

"Aww… I missed you too."

"…"

"What are you writing?"

"…"

"That a love letter?"

Glare.

"So, made your move yet, Scrooge?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Kudou."

"Right. And I'm a snow fairy. Drop the act."

"…"

"You are incorrigible."

"And you should mind your own business."

"Well, you're hurting Ken!"

"What the hell do you know Kudou?"

"I may not know the entire story, but I can see plenty Fujimiya! Kenken's always out of it that even those naïve little fangirls are noticing. Cutting flower petals instead of stems, honestly."

"…"

"You're always staring at him when you think no one's looking. Him giving you the sad puppy eyes when you turn your back. I maybe seem oblivious most of the time, but I'm not blind Fujimiya!"

"…"

"Why do I even bother?"

"…"

"What? You're not gonna say anything?"

"There's nothing to say."

"Damn it. You're one cold bastard, you know."

Temperatures rising.

"What do you want me to say? That I like Hidaka?"

"At the very least, yes."

"Well I don't."

"What?"

"I don't like him. In fact…"

"What?"

"I hate him."

"What the hell-"

"I hate his guts. I hate his carelessness. He always makes such a mess…"

At those words, the two didn't notice the topic of their conversation hastily walked up the stairs, and into his room, silent tears burning those blue green orbs once again.

Why is it so damn cold?

xxx

Downstairs, a piece of paper lay bared on the countertop only to be picked up by a certain blonde whose eyes widened as the meaning of words written on the white sheet began to make sense.

_People say I'm cold._

_Maybe they're right after all._

_I am cold._

_My hands are cold. I can't feel my feet._

_My whole body seems to be frozen in ice._

_Yes._

_I concur._

_I've always been cold._

_I've never minded though._

_I never even noticed._

_Until the warmth came._

_I don't need the warmth._

_I don't want to need it._

_It reminds me that I'm alive._

_I'm not alive._

_Not for a very long time._

_I'm already dead._

_I've always been dead._

_Since that night when I lost everything._

_So please…_

_Just let me be dead some more…_

End chapter.


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